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Dr. Seuss Narrates a Thrill Ride

Dr. Seuss (aka Theodor Geisel) was a beloved children’s author and cartoonist. Known the world over, his work includes some of the most popular children’s books of all time, selling over 600 million copies and being translated into more than 20 languages. Throughout his prolific career Geisel (from here on known as Dr. Seuss) published over 60 books which spawned 11 television specials, five feature films, a Broadway musical, and four television series.


His imaginative and whimsical tales, including “The Cat In The Hat”, "Green Eggs and Ham”, and “Oh, the Places You’ll Go!” were characterized by their rhyming patterns and vibrant illustrations and captured the hearts of children and adults alike.

Now, imagine stepping into a world where reality bends, where the ordinary becomes extraordinary, and the bizarre takes center stage. Because this week we’re going to take a brief look at some of the strangest amusement parks in the world that we’ve come across.


Beyond the realms of typical roller coasters and fairy tale castles lie some hidden gems that redefine our understanding of amusement parks. And we thought, who better to help to narrate our days adventures than Dr. Seuss himself! So, hang on tight and prepare yourself for a roller coaster ride through the extraordinary.


You’re off to Great Places!

Today is your day!

Your mountain is waiting,

So…get on your way!”

Dr. Seuss - Oh the Places You’ll Go!


Mukluk Land – Alaska, USA:

Billed as “Alaska’s most unique destination,” Mukluk Land, in the remote town of Tok, is an eclectic little park run by local journalists who also publish the town paper. Attractions in this former junkyard include mini golf, Skee-Ball, an unusually large cabbage, “the world’s largest mosquito”, rusty snowmobiles and plenty of other odds and ends. Be sure to stop for a photo with the giant mukluk boot at the entrance.


From there to here,

From here to there,

Funny things are everywhere!”

Dr. Seuss - One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish


Patriot Park - Stavropol, Russia:

This self-proclaimed “Military Disneyland” pays tribute to the brute strength of Mother Russia and acts as a showground for international arms dealers. Opened in 2015, this is where you take the family for a fun-filled day of climbing on massive tanks, inspecting sophisticated rocket launchers, and watching elaborate military drills. The kids can even get their hands on some massive rifles, munch on military rations at the canteen, or engage in a wholesome simulation of urban warfare at the tactical-games center. Be sure to pick up a souvenir Stalin fridge magnet in the gift shop on your way home.


Unless someone like you

Cares a whole awful lot,

Nothing is going to get better.

It’s not.

Dr. Seuss - The Lorax


The Rig, Saudi Arabia:

Saudi Arabia is already planning its pivot away from being so dependent on oil, but that hasn’t stopped it from using its petroleum industry as inspiration for a brand new tourist attraction. It’s announced plans to convert an oil rig in the Persian Gulf into a 150,000 square meter “extreme park”. The Rig is described as the “world’s first tourism destination inspired by offshore oil platforms.” There are plans for three hotels, 11 restaurants, roller coasters, bungee jumping, and sky diving.


You have brains in your head.

You have feet in your shoes.

You can steer yourself,

Any direction you choose.”

Dr. Seuss – Oh, The Places You’ll Go!


Diggerland – United Kingdom & New Jersey, USA:

Imagine a theme park where the rides are not roller coasters or merry-go-rounds, but instead, gigantic, roaring excavators and earth-moving machines. Yes, it’s the stuff of a 2-year-old’s dreams. Kids get the chance to operate diggers and other machines themselves, scooping massive piles of dirt to their hearts content. Test your skills with “Hook-a-Duck” where you’ll operate a mechanical grabber in a quest for floating rubber ducks. Or try out “Stack Attack,” where you’ll stack enormous, oversized tires using a telehandler. Like Jenga, but with heavy machinery.


So be sure when you step,

Step with care and great tact.

And remember that life’s

A Great Balancing Act.

And will you succeed?

Yes! You will indeed!

(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed)

Kid, you’ll move mountains.”

Dr. Seuss – Oh, the Places You’ll Go!


Jeju Loveland – Jeju Island, South Korea:

Might want to leave the kids at Diggerland when you visit Jeju Loveland since this is an erotic sculpture park featuring pieces depicting various sexual acts. You’ll be greeted by an army of phallic statues standing tall. And you won’t want to miss the “Oh My! I Can’t Believe My Eyes!” statue or the “Hug Me Tight and Never Let Go” monument. According to their website, the park provides a “proper approach to sex culture and it is decorated with a lot of beautiful artworks.” In addition to wooden penis sculptures and cartoon mascots, there are hands on (pun intended) exhibits, films about sex, and an impressive collection of adult toys.


You’ll miss the best things

If you keep your eyes closed.”

Dr. Seuss


BonBon-Land – Holmegaard, Denmark:

Maybe the closest thing to a real-life, upside-down Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, BonBon-Land is a confection-filled dream for kids and very immature adults. If you can’t cope with a fart joke, the scratch “the most fun amusement park in Denmark” off your list. Seagull droppings, ear wax, and dog farts are among the sweet treats you can snack on in-between rides such as “The Water Rat” and the “Dog Fart Switchback Rollercoaster”, where you’ll be treated to a statue of a giant pooping dog who provides you with flatulent sound effects while you zoom around the track. And be sure to have your picture taken next to the statues of the vomiting rodents and the urinating ants. No, we’re not kidding.


Why fit it,

When you were born to stand out?”

Dr. Seuss (WHY)


Kingdom of the Little People – Kunming, China:

Lots of amusement parks have a height requirement, and this Kingdom is no exception, but in reverse: every employee at this controversial theme park must be no taller than 4 feet 3 inches (under 130 centimeters). The entire park is staffed by dwarfs, who serve as singers, acrobats, dancers, vendors, and guards. There’s even a dwarf king, who gives a special speech for visitors each day.


Don’t give up!

I believe in you all.

A person’s a person,

No matter how small!

Dr. Seuss – Horton Hears a Who!


Isgyvenimo Drama - Vilnius, Lithuania:

If you’re longing for days of gas masks and military interrogations in Soviet occupied Lithuania, then “Survival Drama” is the place for you. Visitors gather in a genuine bunker. There they are relieved of their phones, wallets, and cameras, given thin Soviet-style coats, made to listen to the Soviet anthem and yelled at, interrogated KGB-style. The whole experience lasts about three hours, and to participate you must first sign a waiver, since disobedience may result in physical or psychological punishment. This sure ain’t Disneyland, but you will be treated to a shot of vodka after it’s all over. (Leave the kids at home).

Being crazy isn’t enough.”

Dr. Seuss


We’re thinking that it’s now about time to shut down the rides and turn out the lights. Why did we venture into these peculiar playgrounds, you might be asking yourself? Well, these unusual theme parks offer a refreshing departure from the ordinary, awakening our curiosity and challenging our perception of what constitutes entertainment. They remind us that, as we so often like to remind ourselves, the human imagination knows no bounds. That even the strangest of ideas can manifest into captivating experiences.


And we’re grateful to Dr. Seuss for joining us and for helping narrate our journey today.


Dr. Seuss’s legacy as an imaginative storyteller and advocate for literacy remains unparalleled. His dedication to social issues and his ability to engage readers, through playful yet thought-provoking stories, have left an indelible mark in both literature and the realm of political cartoons. His iconic characters and inspirational stories continue to captivate and educate readers of all ages, reminding us of the power of imagination and the importance of embracing our unique selves.


Tell us about your favorite Dr. Seuss story in our Books forum. And tell us about an interesting day you spent at a theme park in our Outdoor Activities forum.


Today was good.

Today was fun.

Tomorrow is another one.”

Dr. Seuss


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joe.carrillo
Jun 22, 2023

Hmmmm where do I begin, Diggerland sounds fantastic and of course the risk adverse personality in me just sees huge risk there, but wow how fun! While I am pretty sure as in 99.999% sure I won’t be visiting any of these in the near future, the one I would absolutely avoid is Lithuania’s Survival Drama!


I never cared much for being yelled at or abused in any way (i guess masochism isn’t for me). Bizarre that anyone would visit any of these places (Diggerland being the exception).


I did visit Tank Town USA, located in the rural mountain area of North Georgia, it is a total blast. It’s definitely not cheap, but driving a military tanks and crushing o…


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